Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Life Moves Way Too Fast

I don't really even know what to write, so this is going to go stream of consciousness style.

It's already December of 2011, almost the end of it for that matter, and so much has changed this year. I'm not really even sure how we got here because it seems to all have happened in this crazy flash instant.
 The kind that people tell you about when you're a kid, but because you have endless hours of free time to spend with your friends, little responsibility, plenty of hours to playing video games or spend your time however you wish, you just can't relate to it for it to mean anything.

It seems as though the older my girls get, the faster time goes, and that is scary.

Now that I'm finished with school I hope that this crazy life can slow down a little bit, and that there are more hours in the day spent not doing anything, except soaking up life and enjoying it, because it is for sure short for certain.

I really hate to share anything that is not directly my story because I feel like it's not my place to share other people's story on my blog. When I write things on here that impact my husband in any kind of way I run it by him before I hit publish. My girls, they just don't really get a say so become it's not yet their job to determine what's best for them, it's still mine. This is a long explanation to get to the point that my family lost someone this past month that has been hard on all of us. Nearly two weeks ago my husband's grandma joined Jesus in heaven. I don't know if it's appropriate or not to write about this on my blog, but I feel as though I should. I should because she read my blog and I'm sure she still does from above. It's been hard to publish pictures of my girls here without a call from her to tell me how much she enjoyed reading here or thanking me for sharing pictures of the girls with her this way. She loved my husband and my girls fiercely.

It just sucks. It sucks because ever since eight years ago when my husband and I started to date and I met her for the first time and was nervous as ever, she hugged me and accepted me into our family like I had always been apart of it. She showed me love, grace, patience, and to smile my way through life. The way she passed was very fast and yet another reminder of how fast life happens, how fast it's over, and how that much more we should enjoy the short time we have here.

I'm going to try my best to enjoy the moments when my girls love to play with their favorite toy; the laundry basket.



I'm going to make time for the birthday parties and this sisterly love that they share:


I'm going to try to enjoy it when my Riley acts like a monster when we bake:


I'm going to enjoy hanging every last one of our Christmas ornaments:





I'm going to love our gindgerbread house even if it looks nothing like it's supposed to:


And embrace the fact that it's looks exactly the way it's supposed to because it's ours and made from love.
 
 
St. Nick Day 2011:


I'm going to enjoy potty training this little bundle of life, because it will most likely be my last time getting to do it. I'm even going to love and enjoy right now darn it while I'm writing this blog post and my kids are still up running around out of their beds for the tenth time crying and it's 9:30 at night.


I love their love for one another and feel privileged to capture moments like this.


My girls at my Nursing Pinning Ceremony:


My husband was most likely taking this very picture of my mom pinning me when our second born took off and was lost temporarily.  When we found her, she was on the stage, must have just missed her on my way back to my seat.

There are nights when I don't feel like enjoying anything and just want to retreat to my room and catch up on sleep, but I make the conscious choice to go to the Zoo;s Festival of Lights with my girls even though it's 40 degrees out on a cold December night, because we are going to keep family traditions and make memories dammit!


I'm going to snuggle these naked babies like it's no bodies business and I'm going to love every last second of it.



I'm blessed. Blessed beyond measures.


2 comments:

  1. So sorry for your loss! I know it must be so hard. Please know that I am praying for your family right. This is a beautiful post and Im sure she would be very happy to read it!!!

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  2. I'm so sorry for your loss :o( How hard posting must be right now without those phone calls :o( Ugh. Sending lots of good thoughts to your family.

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